


A Ringing in My Ear, or The Price of Knowing

by Sabrina Hawthorne (ChildofWinter)



Series: All is Found [1]
Category: Frozen (Disney Movies)
Genre: Abuse, Action/Adventure, Alcohol, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anna & Elsa will have romantic tension, Bisexual Anna (Disney), Coming Out, Elsa is a trans woman and I'm going to prove it, Erik - Freeform, Frozen 2 spoilers, Gender Dysphoria, Hans is a bastard don't you worry, Hurt/Comfort, I promise I'll get more than 3 chapters into this one, It isn't the focus of the story but it is present, Lesbian Elsa (Disney), Let's call her, Memory Loss, Mommy Issues, Resolved Romantic Tension, Sibling Incest, Trans Character, Trans Elsa (Disney), Trans Female Character, Transitioning, Trauma, Unresolved Romantic Tension, for now, gender euphoria, kinda sorta, please trust me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2020-06-27
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:29:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 18,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21557800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChildofWinter/pseuds/Sabrina%20Hawthorne
Summary: Estranged siblings Anna and Erik haven't spoken in years. When the day of Erik's coronation comes, strange things begin happening that send the siblings on an adventure to discover who they are meant to be -- and maybe to make things right.
Relationships: Anna/Elsa (Disney)
Series: All is Found [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1557547
Comments: 11
Kudos: 63





	1. A Sunny Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> This is a story about coming out, trauma, and recovery. It is a story in which good people do bad things, often to other good people, and in which making amends is not only possible, but necessary. It also involves an irredeemable bastard with murder in his heart. This is a story about abuse, magically assisted gaslighting, and the pain of being a trans woman. Despite all this, it is an adventure story that will have an unambiguously happy ending. I hope you enjoy.

Anna, orphan Princess of the Kingdom of Arendelle, crawls her way to wakefulness slowly and painfully. Sunlight lances through her bedroom window, and there is a knocking at her door.

"Who is it?" she calls in a creaky voice, failing to fight back a yawn.

The familiar voice of the servant Kai responds, "It's coronation day, your Majesty." At this, Anna's eyes snap fully open and she looks about her room. Just as she left it last night, her dress hangs on a wooden mannequin, waiting for her. She bolts out of bed, suddenly filled with excitement and, though she would be loathe to admit it, no small amount anxiety. Today, with the opening of the gates and the ceremony of the coronation, she will be brought face to face with Erik. _It's been so long._ She thinks back to the last time she saw her brother's face, at their parents' funeral three years ago. The memory used to bring tears to her eyes, but she's brought it up and handled it often enough that now it only feels heavy, rather than actively cruel.

Shaking herself clear of the unpleasant -- and unproductive -- thought, she hurries to the washroom to bathe and prepare for the day. She luxuriates in a hot bath, letting her sleep-stiffened muscles relax as she washes herself. When the tub is drained and she's dry, she calls in her maidservant Gerda to help her with her makeup and gown. As the old woman tightens her corset, her thoughts wander.

* * *

_The ballroom is dark. Two children sit on the floor, surrounded by the remnants of a tiny snowstorm. One, with platinum blonde hair, speaks in animated tones to the other, a redhead._

_He gestures to the other child. "I wish I had long hair like you, Anna. Mine isn't as pretty as yours."_

_The redhead giggles. "You're silly, Erik! Boys aren't pretty, boys are_ handsome!" _At this, Erik's face falls, as if disappointed._

_"But don't worry!" Anna continues, undeterred. " You can grow your hair and be the handsomest prince in the world!"_

_"You promise?" asks the blonde, looking hopeful._

_His sister nods. "I promise! I'll braid your hair and everything!" She embraces the older child, and they rest there for a moment, neither willing to admit that staying up this late has exhausted them. after a moment, Anna pulls away, smiling hopefully._

_"You said we were gonna build a snowman, let's build a snowman!" She pulls the older child to his feet, and he relents, dusting the floor with more fresh snow._

* * *

Half an hour later, Anna emerges from her room like a dove from a cage, her elegant green ballgown flowing behind her as she delightedly rushes towards the entrance of the castle that is her home. She passes the many servants finishing preparations for the day's events, looking in wonder at the stacks of dishes on their way to the great hall. Eventually, she makes it to the ornate double doors towering at the front of the castle, unopened for so long. The princess stands between two guards, each of which has their hand on one of the doors' handles, waiting patiently. They look at their princess curiously, and one of them fights back a smile. Anna smiles back, though, and his composure is broken at the young woman's infectious presence.

"You get the order yet boys?" she asks with a sly grin. She knows full well that if they had, she wouldn't be standing here waiting for them to follow it.

"We should soon, your Majesty, but we have yet to hear from-" The guard cuts himself off before taking a breath and continuing. "-from the Prince." Anna nods with understanding, her excitement somewhat dampened by the thought of seeing Erik. _I'll think about him when the coronation begins. Until then,_ she reasons, _I'm going to have a nice day in my kingdom._

After a few minutes of waiting, during which Anna has found a seat on a nearby couch and begun talking to a painting as if it were a person, a servant enters the hall, walking towards the gates at a brisk pace. Anna leaps out of her seat and follows the woman as she approaches the guards.

After a moment, she speaks three quick, confident words. "Open the gates."

Anna had thought this morning that she would have rushed out of the castle the same way she had her rooms, free to explore the kingdom like she hasn't done in years. What she hadn't considered was that on the day of a new King's coronation, dignitaries would be coming from across the known world to pay their respects. And what she hadn't foreseen was that all those nobles and merchants, along with hundreds of citizens of the kingdom itself lucky enough to be given the opportunity, would have crowded around the gates hours ago, awaiting permission to enter and begin the festivities. As such, she is met with a stampede of people, every single one of whom are complete strangers to her. She is pushed back as if by a tidal wave, completely unable to move of her own accord. Fortunately, those nearest the front either recognize her for her station or quickly piece it together based on her attire, and so rather than be trampled to death, she is simply greeted by then times ten hundred handshakes, bows, curtsies, and a million other foreign greetings she doesn't have the slightest idea how to respond to. It takes her nearly two hours to finally push her way past the crowd, by which time the sun is already high in the sky. She has an hour at most to explore and enjoy herself before her day begins in earnest.

* * *

_Anna wakes up in her bed with a jerk. It's the morning. She feels disoriented, dizzy somehow. Sitting up, she realizes why -- the last thing she remembers is the ballroom. Was that last night? Did her mother find them asleep again and carry them to their room? No, that couldn't be. Something had gone wrong. She and Erik had been playing with... what? No, it hadn't been the ballroom at all. It had been outside. They'd been playing in the snow, building snowmen and... what had happened? Had she hit her head?_

_She looks over to her brother's bed and sees it empty._

_Panic begins to rise in her chest. "Mama?" she calls into the night. After several long moments with no response, she gets_ _out of bed and pads to the door. Looking into the hallway, she sees Erik, peeking out of the room next to hers. Seeing his sister, Erik ducks back inside and closes the door. Anna rushes to him, knocking frantically._

_"Erik, are you okay? I don't remember, but something bad happened. Did you get hurt?" There's no response. she's breathing heavy now, near tears. "Erik, please talk to me!"_

_She hears a soft *thump* against the door, and the space beneath it grows darker. She sits too, her back against the door. Long moments pass, and she nearly falls asleep before he speaks._

_"I hurt you." His voice is different from how she remembers, somehow. Deeper, maybe?_

_He continues softly. "I remember playing outside. We had a snowball fight, and i knocked you into a tree and you wouldn't wake up. You've been sleeping for two days."_

_There's a jolt of fresh panic in Anna's chest, and a jolt of pain in her head. Of course. Her head has been hurting since she woke, hasn't it?_

_"I'm sorry," Erik says, his voice barely above a whisper. "Mama and Papa say you might forget things for a while." At this, Anna feels a lump form in her throat._ He must think I'm angry.

_She puts a hand on the door, tears beginning to fall. "Please don't be sorry Erik. You're my big brother, I love you."_

_"I love you too," he replies, and Anna can hear that he's crying too. "Do you promise you're not mad?"_

_"I promise."_

* * *

With the sudden decimation of her previous time limit, Anna decides to prioritize and make the most of her short window. _To the docks first,_ she decides, reasoning that she will have much more time to get to know the citizens of her kingdom in the future, while she'll have much less opportunity to see visitors and traders, most of whom will be gone before the month is over.

So she makes her way towards the sea, asking shopkeepers and passersby for directions whenever her memory of the capital city fails her. On her way, she stops by a small vendor selling truffles and indulges herself, buying a cloth bag full of the treats. To her disappointment, they're nearly gone by the time she steps onto the sturdy wood of Arendelle's docks, breathing in the salty sea air. Despite her unsatisfied sweet tooth, she finds herself smiling, excited by the sight of crates being unloaded from massive decked ships. She walks along the docks, greeting sailors with a friendly smile, and reveling in the joy of the outside world. Before she knows it, she's running alongside docked ships, taking in the day around her.

Out of nowhere, she smashes into someone, knocking herself off balance, and she stumbles backwards. Attempting to recover her footing, she steps, and finds no dock beneath her foot. She begins to fall into the sea. But she's stopped by a hand gripping her outstretched wrist. When the panic fades, she looks up, and sees who that hand belongs to. A man with auburn hair and light green eyes is looking at her with a worried expression. She stares for a long moment, her thoughts muddled with fear, relief, and attraction. The man pulls her to her feet, and she instinctively steps close, unwilling to look away from his eyes. He smiles kindly, and she has to stop herself from making a noise.

His expression changes in a way Anna can't place. "Are you okay?" His voice is deep, and his tone is perfectly polite as he steps to a respectable distance.

"Yeah, you're amazing," she says without thinking. Then she realizes, and sputters to correct herself. "I mean, I-I'm amazing. Or, I'm great! Because you saved me. Thanks." She blushes, but he doesn't seem to notice her blunder.

He bows, low, still not breaking eye contact. "I'm Prince Hans of the Southern Isles."

Her eyes widen. A prince, on top of it all. She must be dreaming. "I'm Princess Anna, of Arendelle. It's very nice to meet you, Hans."

His eyes grow large in mirror with hers. "Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't realize!" His smile takes on a sly aspect that Anna can't help but admire. "Could one assume you'll be at the coronation, then?"

Just then, the noon bell rings, and Anna realizes her time is up. "One could assume," she replies with a knowing smile. "In fact, I should leave now if I want to attend the ceremony."

"Is this goodbye, then?" His eyes are piercing, and he looks hopeful.

She giggles. "it doesn't have to be, your Majesty." She turns, hoping to leave him charmed. Unfortuantely, her foot catches on an empty bucket, and she barely avoids breaking her nose on the wood of the dock, stumbling to keep from falling. She hurries away, too embarrassed to look back.


	2. Tell the Guards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Erik has a morning which mirrors Anna's, the author refuses to research the royal traditions of Norway in favor of her own half-baked aesthetic preferences, and we learn more about what the siblings have forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story begins as a slight variation on the original film, with some elements changed. This will change with time. Until then, I hope that this twist on the events of the first film proves compelling on its own until things begin to get interesting.

Prince Erik, orphan Prince of Arendelle and soon-to-be King of the same, stands at the balcony outside his room, overlooking a kingdom he has not seen up close in more than three years. The sun has yet to break the surface of the horizon, but it is close, and it dyes the entire sky a dark blue, like the sea at the point when the sand drops off into its true depth. In the early spring air, the metal railing of the balcony is cool against his skin, and a small frost has grown around his fingers. He doesn't notice this. Erik's thoughts are preoccupied with a deep anxiety. It is an anxiety he has felt ever since he was a child, and one which he has never been able to name. Today, it is stronger than it has been in a long time.

The prince is already fully clothed; he woke much earlier, before there was even a hint of light in the sky, and when it had become clear he would not sleep again that night, he decided to get a head start on the morning. Now, he turns from his kingdom and to a painting on the wall nearby. It depicts his family as it once was, the King and Queen together, holding their children. He notes, as he does most mornings, that in the painting, baby Anna's hair is all red. Not a pale streak to be seen. And again, he knows this means _something,_ but he can't figure out what. He knows what his sister looks like. She's had a stripe of hair the same color as his own since she was born, and he knows that. So why doesn't this portrait show it?

He wanders over to a shelf of books out of habit, picking one at random. He knows he has time to read before he is called out to prepare. He looks at the book in his hands, and is surprised to see the odd writing on the cover. _Mother's old book of stories._ He hasn't touched it since he was a child. He shakes his head and puts the book back, choosing another more carefully. He finds one of his favorites: a book imported from somewhere in the east about a woman who disguises herself as a man to join the fight against an invading force. He's always found the heroine compelling, and he never tires of reading about her adventures.

* * *

_Erik stands in the hallway atop a clumsy pile of pillows, willow-switch sword held high. Before him, Anna stands, an expression of pretend awe on her face._

_"I am Fa-Mulan, and I'm a girl!" the young Prince cries, horribly misquoting the moment he recalls from his new favorite book._

_Anna points an accusatory finger in his direction. "But how can a girl fight in the army? Girls are weak!"_

_Erik points his sword at his sister, puffing out his chest. "You're wrong, Shang! I can help you beat the Hums!"_

_"It's 'Huns,' Erik," Anna says, breaking character._

_"The Huns!" the blonde continues, as if he hadn't been interrupted. "I'm gonna be the best fighter this army has ever seen!"_

* * *

A knock at the door startles the Prince out of the story. "Come in, Kai," he calls, closing the book without a bookmark. He knows how the chapter ends anyway.

The manservant opens the door, but only takes a step inside. "It's time for the final rehearsal, your Majesty- er, your Grace."

"Thank you, Kai, I'll be down in just a moment." Erik rises from the bed and straightens his suit. Kai leaves, closing the door behind. Looking to the balcony again, Erik sees that it's fully morning now. _Anna might be up,_ he realizes with dread. _I'm going to have to see her today. Gods, she must truly despise me by now._ A swell of guilt freezes him in place for a few terrifying moments before he manages to take a step and replace the book on its shelf. He opens a drawer on his dresser and pulls out a pair of white cloves. Comfort objects to make the day a little easier to get through. When he leaves, he doesn't notice the icy boot prints he leaves in the carpet.

As he leaves his room, he looks to Kai, waiting for him by the doorway. "Go ahead of me. Tell the guards to open up the gates."

Down in the chapel, he stands before the empty pews, looking at the ornaments on the cushion before him. The sceptre and sphere are intricate, layered in gold leaf and set with precious stones. He picks them up; they're not as heavy as he was expecting.

The priest speaks. "During the ceremony proper, your Grace, you will-"

"-need to remove the gloves, yes Father," Erik says, his voice more flippant than he intends. "Sorry."

"You should take this more seriously, your Grace. You are inheriting the legacy of your King Father." This makes Erik cringe. His father. His father who, well-meaning or no, had one day decided it was no longer safe to play outside with his sister. His father who had been distant and cold for the sake of ruling, his father who had taken --

He stops his thoughts. The priest is right. He has a duty to his people, and to his family. He nods. "I apologize, Father. I'm simply tired. I won't wear the gloves during the ceremony, I swear." The priest nods, satisfied.

"Go on," says the old man. "Finish, then prepare for the ceremony proper." Erik recites his lines and places the sphere and sceptre on the cushion again. Then he sits, waiting for the noon bell to ring.

* * *

_"Mama, Papa!" Erik's voice is high and broken. He holds Anna in his arms, and his tears stain her cheek. In moments, the King and Queen are rushing through the doors to the ballroom, panicked looks on their faces._

_"What's happened?" Agnarr asks as he kneels before his son. His voice clipping and short._

_Erik sobs. "W-We were play- playing, and I hit he-her with my magic!" He can't keep his words from catching as he cries._

_Agnarr stands and looks to his wife. "Look after them."_

_"Where are you going?" Her voice is more calm than his, but her fear is still evident._

_"To my study. We'll need the map." Iduna nods, then kneels next to Erik. Agnarr sprints off._

_Iduna looks Erik in the eye as she gently takes Anna in her arms. "Erik, I need you to look at me, honey." He tries to meet her eyes, but he can't see clearly through his tears. She doesn't seem to mind._

_"It's going to be okay, Erik. Anna's going to be okay, but we need to get help from some other magical people."_

_This stops the boy for a moment. "Other magical people?" Iduna nods, smiling._

_"That's right. Rock trolls who look like boulders!" She slips into a theatrical cadence, distracting her child from the moment. "And they know all sorts of things about magic."_

_Erik tries and fails to wipe a line of tears from his eyes. "Do they know about my powers?"_

_Iduna pauses, and her son can't read her expression. "Not about yours in particular, but they know a lot. They'll be able to help Anna, I promise." The boy calmed some, though his sobs showed no signs of sobbing. He reached out and touched his sister's face._

_"Please wake up Anna. I still want you to braid my hair."_

* * *

Erik slips the gloves off his hands as people filter into the chapel. The anxiety is pushing at him again, like a gravitation pulling his organs away from the center of his being. His hands begin to shake as he sees more and more people looking at him. Some wonder at the handsome suit he wears, purple and teal, while others seem to be evaluating him. The hermit prince, come into the sun at last. He knows they must wonder if he's ready to rule. He wonders the same thing.

Anna comes in close to last, and he can't avoid meeting her eye without being rude. She smiles at him. He tries, but he knows it must look like a grimace, because her face falls as she takes her seat. The ceremony begins once everyone is seated and silent. The choir up above chants an old hymn as he reaches for the items on the cushion. His hands are shaking as if from the cold. As he lifts the ceremonial artifacts, his vision tunnels, and he fears he may faint. Have the artifacts grown colder? He swears they weren't quite so frigid during the rehearsal. As he begins to chant, he glances down, and sees something that nearly manages to stop his recital mid-word. The artifacts are both covered in a thin, near-invisible layer of frost.

He finishes the ceremony as quickly as possible, nearly throwing the artifacts back onto their cushion, and walks past the still-seated crowd. He looks at Anna one last time, and the look of confusion on her face tells him that she's noticed something is wrong. He doesn't pause to say anything. He simply walks. He can barely think from the panic, and now... he doesn't know what. Where did the frost come from, and why does it scare him so much?

* * *

_"Born with the powers or cursed?" The short man, clearly made of stone, puts a gentle hand on his sister's head._

_"Born," Iduna says confidently._

_"We think," Agnarr adds._

_The stone man nods. "There is something we can do, but it's drastic."_

_"What is it?" Agnarr replies almost before the troll can finish. The old man sighs before replying._

_"The magic hit her head. This means that it is part of her thoughts now. And it means her thoughts are connected to the girl's magic." At this, the King, Queen, and troll all looked to Elsa._

* * *

Erik nearly flinches when he sees Anna enter the ballroom, but he keeps his composure. What awaits him at the hands of his sister? He's spent the past ten years avoiding her like the plague. And what's worse, he has no good explanation as to why. He knows she must hate him, and he can't blame her. He'd hate him too if he'd been abandoned like that. So when she reaches his side, he keeps his eyes facting directly forward, wearing his best neutral mask. A long, awkward moment passes as the two observe the dancing people around them. Then, she speaks.

"You look nice." Her voice is sweet and high. It sounds like springtime. He has to take several deep breaths before his chest relaxes enough to let him reply.

"Thank you. You look lovely as well."

She giggles. Actually giggles, as if there's no wall between them. "How formal of you, _Your Grace."_ She puts a teasing emphasis on the last, and Erik can't help but chuckle softly. Gods, how long has it been since he's laughed?

He looks at his sister. Really looks at her, for the first time in a long time. She really is lovely; he notices how neatly her hair is braided into a bun, and all he can think of is the little girl he used to know, who would always let her hair down as soon as possible, letting it get tangled in leaves and grass as she played in the gardens. Despite himself, he finds himself holding back a genuine laugh, all the way from his belly.

Anna's eyes narrow and her mouth pouts. "What's so funny?"

"I'm sorry," he says, letting a small smile take his face, "I just can't believe I've survived this long without someone telling me off like that."

"What do you mean?"

He looks at her. "I mean it's good to talk to you again, Anna. It's been too long."

She smiles back at him, and he's shocked to see not anger, grief, or sadness, but _relief_ mixed with her usual cheer. _Has she no anger for me? No resentment?_

After a moment of much more comfortable silence, she takes a slow, deep breath in and asks, "Do you smell that?" Erik sniffs at the air, and sure enough, he does.

"Chocolate," they say in chorus. Then, they look at each other, and the laugh in Erik's belly rolls out. It builds, too; soon, they're both shaking with it. _Maybe things will be okay after all._


	3. For the First Time in Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which things begin to go right, and in which things begin to go horribly wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case it wasn't clear, both of the Arendelle heirs have had their memories altered in this story. How exactly, and to what extent, remains to be seen.

Anna looks at her brother, smiling more genuinely than she has in a very long time. _For the first time in forever,_ she thinks, _he looks happy._ And she thinks that for all these years, as he's put doors and walls and unbearable silence between them, this is all she's wanted. To see him happy again. She turns towards the crowd and sees a woman approaching Erik. She has brown hair done in in an elegant style, and her yellow gown is almost as wide as she is tall.

"Your Grace," she says with a thick accent. "May I have your first dance?" Erik looks taken aback, but takes the woman's hand. He looks at Anna as he's led away, and she smiles mischievously. She watches as the crowd makes a wide berth for the King and his partner, as much for politeness as to avoid stepping on her dress. The two begin to move to the song, and she watches with a smile. She doesn't have much time to think, however, because after a few moments she spots someone moving towards her. Turning her head, she sees him. The charming prince from the docks, Hans.

He holds out a hand, his handsome smile returning as if they had never stopped talking. "Your Majesty. May I have this dance?"

The princess smiles and nods. "You may."

Hans leads her out onto the floor just as a lively rune starts, and the two set to dancing with vigor. Soon, they're panting and laughing, and Anna realizes just how close their faces are. She blushes, standing a little straighter and pulling away.

"Hey." she says, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "I know a nice spot just past the inner doors. Do you wanna...?" She doesn't really know what she's implying; the rush of human contact, the charm and the flirting, it's carrying her, and she doesn't necessarily feel like using her best judgement at the moment.

Hans nods nervously. "Are you sure it's okay? With the celebration and all..." he trails off, the image of a gentleman concerned for propriety. But there's something else in his eyes that Anna can't place.

She takes his hand. "We'll be fine, I'm the heir apparent to the throne. Come on!" Barely pausing to look back, she leads him away from the dance floor and into the corridor.

* * *

Two hours later, the prince and princess are leaning against the railing of a balcony overlooking the sea, slightly less excited and noticeably more drunk. Hans' glass still sloshes with champagne, but Anna's is empty, sitting precariously on the edge of a chest of drawers in another room. She is laughing harder than the situation requires.

_"Twelve?"_ she asks, incredulous. "How did your mother survive?" Then she pauses. "Sorry, I shouldn't assume-"

The prince cuts her off. "It's okay, she's fine. She's not having any more, I can assure you of that, but she's alive and well." He laughs. "Not that you'd know, from how she talks these days.

Anna looks shocked. "Hans, that's your mother, you can't make fun of her!"

"I can when she's the Queen and has the power to marry us off to whoever she wants." He ignores the mock-offense on the other redhead's face. _You're of age, and it's your duty to contribute to the crown!"_ he says in a poor imitation of an old woman's voice.

_"Hans!"_ Anna insists, slapping him on the arm. "You're handsome enough, but if you don't stop this right now I'm not going to-"

There is a significant pause wherein Hans looks at her blankly, and she realizes just how explicit she could have been."

"Not going to what?" The prince's voice is calm and sounds genuinely confused.

"Nothing," she says, too quickly. "I just meant that it's rude to talk about family that way. No matter what they do or say, we have to keep family close." Suddenly she's a little sad, and she doesn't feel like flirting anymore.

They don't talk for a while. Anna, thinking about her brother, and Hans, watching closely.

After nearly five minutes, he risks a question. "What happened between you?" When Anna looks into his eyes, they're earnest and open. Her mind muddled from drink and tiredness, she relents.

"They call him the Hermit King, I hear." She looks at her arms, crossed on the railing. "And it fits better than they realize. Tonight is the first time he's said a word to me in three years." _More than that,_ she realizes a moment later. But she doesn't mention it. She doesn't want to talk about her parents.

"I don't know why, but for some reason he just decided to shut himself off one day. He barely left his room, and when he did, it was always when he knew I was asleep or somewhere where we wouldn't cross paths. I'd see him in the halls sometimes, but when he noticed me he'd ignore me and slip into the nearest room with a door that locks."

Hans puts a gloved hand on her shoulder. "I'm so sorry." At any other time, she would have backed away from the touch, but now her skin is warm from the drink and the summer night air, and she hasn't touched someone who wasn't castle staff in nearly a decade.

She shakes her head. "It's okay. I know he loves me, and he seemed friendly enough tonight. It's just..." She realizes she's crying. "I just hope he'll tell me why. I miss my brother." She turns to the prince and puts her head on his chest. He doesn't miss a beat. He wraps his arms around her and holds her as she sobs. He doesn't look at her.

"It sounds so lonely living in this castle all alone, with the gates closed and all." His voice is low and calm, soothing.

"It was," she replies after a moment. "But I wasn't alone. There are dozens of people who work here, and they're all good people. Remi, the chef is actually a trained chocolateer, a-and he makes the most wonderful truffles in t-the world." Then, after another moment, "But Yeah. I can't say it was the liveliest." She smiles, then realized Hans can't see it.

Hans pulls away and lifts Anna's chin to meet her eyes. "Would you like to go back to the ball?"

"Why?"

"To talk to Erik. I think I'd like to meet him." He smiles gently.

She looks away, brow furrowed. "I-I don't know. He was having a nice time dancing wi-ith someone." Her words catch on the sobs that haven't worked their way out yet.

"For hours on end?" His voice is tinted with sarcasm. She looks at him for a moment before letting out a small giggle.

"Yeah, good point. Let's go. I think you'll like him, he's all proper like you.

* * *

_Anna is older now, lanky and awkward in adolescence. She stands outside her brother's door, preparing herself to knock again. She swears the air is colder here than it was in her room Taking a deep breath, she knocks five times, in a rhythm she knows Erik will recognize._

_"Do you wanna build-"_

_"Go away, Anna." She doesn't know what she expected. It's been a month since he's felt up to playing, and winter is nearly over. In the back of her mind, she notices again that his voice it different somehow._

_She looks down dejectedly. "Okay. I love you Erik, and I'm sorry if I hurt you." She slides a piece of paper under his door. It's a drawing of them both in the snow._

* * *

"Erik!" Anna's voice rings though the ballroom, which by now is significantly less bustling. The princess sees her brother at the snack table, and he looks up in her direction with a piece of chocolate still in his mouth. As his sister approaches, his eyes dart to the man she trails behind her.

"Erik, this is Hans, Prince of the Southern Isles." She steps back and looks at the man beside her expectantly.

Hans bows deeply. "Your Grace, it is an honor to meet you. My apologies for not officially introducing myself earlier, I was rather preoccupied." At the last, he avoids looking at Anna.

"Welcome to Arendelle, Hans. I hope you've enjoyed your time in my kingdom so far." Erik's voice is perfectly smooth and polite, but Anna can see the tension in his mouth. _Is he nervous? Why?_ As the two men shake hands and make small talk, she stares at his face. _I suppose it's been a while for him, too. And he has more responsibility as King, now._

"-sister is lovely, if you'll pardon my being so forward." Hans' voice breaks her out of her thoughts.

"Pardon?" she says before Erik can speak.

The prince's eyes grow wide. "Oh, I. Um, apologies, your Majesty. I've just had a lovely evening with you, and I wanted to complement you on your gown."

This brings a laugh out of Anna and a smile from her brother. "No need to be so formal, Hans. Thank you for the complement. For what it's worth, I think you look dashing."

Erik pipes up. "Should I be here for this, or should I give my blessing and go?"

"Your blessing?" Anna scoffs. "Don't get all high and mighty just because you hold the highest position in the land, _snowball._ _"_

For a moment, it seems like she may have overstepped herself. Erik's face grows serious, and he seems to loom over the two redheads. Then he can't hold it anymore, and he's bent over laughing. His laughter bounces around the room, clear and full and joyful. "Anna, _never_ call me that again, by the gods! Are you nine?"

It's Anna's turn to laugh, but she still looks embarrassed. "I'm sorry Erik, it's a habit!"

"Well, it's 'Your Grace' now, even from you. If I hear you call me that again, I'll lock you in the dungeon." The smile still plays at his face.

Grinning, his she replies, "So long as you visit more than once every three years."

They both fall silent the moment she's said it. Hans looks between them as if expecting something. Erik suddenly won't meet his sister's eyes.

"I think I must retire; my duties as King begin tomorrow, and I must be rested." The new King walks off at an irritated pace. As he passes, Anna feels the temperature drop several degrees.

"Erik, wait!" Her breath clouds when she calls, and her curiosity is drowned by the fear.

Hans follows her as she walks after her brother. "I'm so sorry, I-"

"Please," Anna says, barely turning to look at him through teary eyes, "Just leave." Then she takes off, not bothering to see his reaction. "Erik, please, I'm sorry!" The king doesn't stop walking.


	4. Shaking Legs

The door slams shut behind Erik. His heart is racing, and his thoughts are bouncing around inside his body like a rubber ball in a too-small box, threatening to fly astray and break something. He looks at his hands, and lets out a startled noise. His gloves are _wet,_ with patches of jagged frost making the fingers stiff. He rips them off, and it's like lifting the lid off of a boiling pot of water. Mist trails behind the cloth as it flies across the room. Suddenly, his head is throbbing as if he's woken up hungover, only further compounding his panic. _I ran from her, again. From the world. The moment things got tense, I fled, like a coward. Some King I am._

There's a frantic knocking at his door, and with a sound like a sword being drawn, a burst of _something_ erupts from his hands, coating the floor around him in thick, rippling ice. When he sees this, the King's head thrums with pain, his thoughts still rattling like a badly made bell. Without thinking, he looks at the portrait of his family on the wall. Seeing Anna's hair, pure red, does nothing to help with the pain, and it feels as if his parents are staring down at him. As if they know something he doesn't.

"Erik? What was that sound? Are you okay?" His sister's voice is panicked on the other side of the door. He opens his mouth, but no sound comes. No words. He can't think straight. What would he say? That he doesn't have a good reason for ignoring his only family for so long? That there's magic coming from his hands? When he thinks _magic,_ the pain pulses again. His head feels like an overripe fruit that's been left in the sun, ready to burst. He's a coward, he'll be an awful King, a disappointment to his mother, and _something is happening to my han-_

He doesn't hear it happen, but he feels it. It's as if he's suddenly ascended a hundred feet in the air. His ears _pop_ from the change in air pressure, and he can't tell if his skin is crawling with crackling heat or razor cold. A dam breaks in his mind, like ice cracking and falling from a glacier, sending waves the size of memories through his body.

Then the pain is gone. It's quiet like the space between the pages of a book. He opens his eyes, and his entire room is coated in ice and snow. It stripes the room like spokes on a wheel, with him as the point of origin. Snowflakes -- actual snowflakes -- flutter about the air as if just recently blown about by the wind. For the space of a heartbeat, he's confused and scared. Then... _Wait, why am I afraid? The magic always does this when I'm upset._ Then Erik, orphan King of Arendelle, realizes that he remembers.

He stands, legs shaking from the exertion. He takes a step towards the door, then another. He hears his sister's voice calling him again.

"Erik? Please, come out, something is-" She doesn't finish her sentence. Erik rips the door open and leans against the frame to stay on his feet. Her eyes grow wide when she sees into the room, then they shut as she winces. _Of course. She doesn't remember._

"Anna, I-" he stutters. "I'm sorry." Then, he collapses, and the world goes dark.

* * *

_A voice sings a simple song. A four-note melody, rising at the end like a bird's call. Erik remembers --_

_Erik? Is that his name, really? That doesn't seem appropriate. But oh well. That's an issue for later._

_Back on track. Erik remembers this song from his childhood. His mother sang it to him some nights, when he was upset and he was scared of his magic. It comes to him now, as if from some far-flung mountain top. He wants to run, to find it, to find_ her, _but for some reason he can't. Why can't he move? Where is he to begin with?_

* * *

Opening his eyes feels like lifting lead weights. His mind feels reticent to leave the world of dreams, as if there is something important to be found there that he's forgotten. But sleep has left him, so he decides to wake. He's on a bed. Anna's bed, if memory serves. At the thought of Anna, he winces. But not, he notices, from a headache. He sits up. His head swims for a moment, as if he's dehydrated. It's still dark; it must still be the night of the coronation.

He looks at his hands. They don't look any different, but he can feel something _moving_ through his fingers, his palms, his wrists. closing his eyes, he can feel it flow up his arms and into the rest of his body. It's unnerving, but for some reason it's also comforting, like a long-gone friend returning. When he opens his eyes, he sees the bed coated in a thin frost like frozen dew, and he immediately withdraws from the feeling. It feels like moving a little too close to a fire. He looks around the room, and is surprised to see Anna, asleep in a chair beside the bed. Then, thinking to the last thing he remembers, he supposes it makes good sense. _So I'm magical._ The thought comes unbidden, but it's not as shocking or upsetting as it should be. It feels like it should be obvious. Of course he has magic. Why wouldn't he?

The anxiety is back. For one night, it almost seemed to have slept, but here in the dark, the vague weight settles back onto him as if condensing from the air. _What am I going to tell her?_ he thinks, looking at Anna. _It's not like I have any more idea of what's happening than she does. I can barely bear to talk to her about my mundane behavior, let alone causing a blizzard in my room._

Erik stands slowly, making sure not to wake his sister, and moves to the door. _I need time to think. Maybe the library has answers-_

* * *

_Erik watches his father run form the ballroom in a panic as his mother holds an unconscious Anna in her arms. She's looking at him, saying something in a soothing tone. 'The library,' he had said._

* * *

"Erik? Oh my god, Erik, are you alright?" Anna's voice wakes the King, and he realizes he's slumped against the closed door. Had he fallen asleep? Fainted?

Anna sounds panicked. "Can you hear me? Erik, oh my god, please say something."

"I can hear you, Anna," he says, looking up at her kneeling beside him. He sees his mother again, for just a flash, kneeling in the ballroom. "I'm sorry for scaring you. I was trying to go to the library, but then-"

"Without waking me up?" Her voice cracks like a whip. "Erik, what is going _on?_ This is the first time you've seen my face in three years, and it feels like you still can't get away from me fast enough." Her eyes are like stones in rain; hard, but running over with tears. "If I did something wrong, or you're sick, or whatever it is, can you please just talk to me? You're all I have."

Erik looks at his hands. _Just show her. Talk to her. You're a King. You have to be a man and take responsibility._ "Anna," he begins, but his voice catches and he has to start over. "Did you see my room?"

She nods. "Gerda helped me carry you in here. What happened?"

"I'm not sure. I think... I think it was me." He lifts a hand closes his eyes until he feels the strange sensation again. It feels like someone opens a window, and the cool is much more comfortable. When he opens his eyes, it looks like there's a tiny snowstorm flurrying around his hand. Anna, meanwhile, is wincing at the sight, as if in pain.

"What are you doing, giving me a brain freeze?" her joke falls flat; it's clear she's actually in pain.

"Sorry." Erik drops the magic as quickly as he can, and her pain fades. He remembers the headache he'd had during his episode. _When I looked at the portrait._ "Anna, I think whatever's happening is happening to both of us."

She looks at him confused. "What? Are you saying I can-" her face tightens with pain "-do that magic thing too?"

He blinks. "I hadn't thought of that. Maybe? Honestly, I'm as in the dark as you are. But I have a few ideas where we can find answers." _I said we,_ he realizes. Anna smiles excitedly.

"Absolutely! I-I mean, Sure! I'll follow your lead." She looks away embarrassed. Erik stands slowly, making sure to keep himself steady. He helps Anna to her feet, and then opens the door.


	5. Lullaby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Anna has trouble reading and Erik falls asleep quite a lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may ask why, if Erik remembered during his episode, why he doesn't seem to remember when he wakes. To this, I ask you you whether or not you have ever realized that someone is abusing you.
> 
> Additionally, I used this: http://virtualkeyboard.biz/elder-futhark

Anna hates reading in the library. The lamplight never seems to be enough, and her eyes always begin to ache if she spends more than a few minutes among the shelves. Reading is much better in the sunlight, she thinks. It connects the story to the real world in a way that the books themselves can't do on their own. And it doesn't help that Erik has them looking through the most thoroughly dull tomes in the entire castle: Geographies. Why he's suddenly convinced that knowing more about Arendelle's surrounding landscape will help things escapes Anna for a handful of reasons, chief among which is that she can't quite seem to keep her mind on the topic of Erik's ice... thing. Whatever it is. She could hold the truth in her mind for a moment or two, but after Erik tried to explain the details to her, she had realized that there was some kind of barrier in her mind, probably like the one he'd been able to break the previous night.

They'd set to their search bright and early the day after the Coronation. According to Erik, there should be a map somewhere that would lead the siblings to the source of the barrier, where it could be removed, and the two could begin to make amends. Anna doesn't mention that this undertaking so soon after years of isolation is probably a good enough start on its own.

_-trade deal with Weselton was integral in dealing with the kingdom's lack of native fruit crop..._ The book in front of her is so dense it's giving her a (thankfully not supernatural) headache. Maps are scattered about blocks of tiny text that reads to her as if some scholar somewhere was just showing off his knowledge of Arendelle's politics.

"Hey Erik!" she calls across the library to where he sits at a lamplit table his own book open in front of him.

He jerks up, and Anna giggles, knowing she's caught him sleeping. "Hmm?"

"Remember that story book you used to love?"

He turns in his seat. "Mulan?"

"Yeah, that's the one!" Anna walks toward her brother, keeping the thick tome in her arms open. "Do you still have that, or is it in here somewhere?"

"It's in my room," he says, raising an eyebrow. "Why, do you want me to read it to you?"

Anna snorts. "You know for a fact I'd take that offer if you were being serious. But no, I was just thinking. I remember how you loved that book, but I never connected with it the way you did."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, remember when we used to play outside? You wanted to be a warrior like her! We'd set up these elaborate scenes for you to save me from monsters and, uh -- of gosh, what were they called-"

"Huns?"

"Yes, exactly! The Huns!"

Erik shakes his head, smiling. "Yes, I remember. If I recall, I-" He stops suddenly. Anna's head spikes with pain and she nearly drops her book as a cloud of mist rises from the ground surrounding her brother. She averts her eyes, but keeps pace towards him, sitting down at the seat next to his. She can feel the moisture condensing on her left side, and it doesn't feel like water. Instead, it feels like her arm is falling asleep, tingling in a sort of empty way. She doesn't lean away.

It takes a few tense, uncomfortable minutes before the cloud fades, taking Anna's headache with it. Erik shakes his head, then looks up at his sister with confused eyes.

"Remembering again?" asks the redhead as calmly as she can manage. _I don't know if I'm ever gonna get used to that._

He nods. "It had to do with mother."

"And father?"

Erik stills for a moment before he nods. "Him too."

Anna puts a hand on the blonde's arm. "Can I ask about it?"

"I don't think that would be wise." He doesn't pull away so much as he stiffens at the touch. But when Anna makes to remove her hand, he grabs it with a naked hand.

"Thank you for asking, though. You deserve to know, but I want to wait until we can get your memory back." His hand is cool, but not unpleasant.

"Right. And how exactly is all of this supposed to help us make that happen?"

"Father," he says. "I remember him running off the night I hurt you. Running here."

She nods. "Okay. So you think that-" she winces, "-that he came to find something to wipe our brains?"

"Something like that." He smiles somberly. "I'm really sorry this has to sound so secretive."

"No, I get it. I get a brain freeze when we talk about it, I know you're not trying to hide anything." What she doesn't mention is that she's willing to let him hide some things if it means getting to spend time with her brother again.

They spend another hour or so reading together, occasionally chiming in to compare notes or ask questions. Erik does better than Anna does; he has a knack for this kind of quiet work, and he has a better idea of what to look for anyway. But despite their work, it becomes clear that their search isn't proving fruitful. Before long Anna has wandered to a shelf full of folklore and fairy tales. She picks one at random, fully intending to finish the whole thing before Erik finds his next potential lead.

She opens to the first story in the book. It's written in verse, and in a language she can't read. But what really catches her interest is that all over the page, words seem to be crossed out and replaced with new phrases scribble in the margin. These, she can read. She takes this as a challenge, trying to puzzle out the rest from the pieces she understands.

ᚹᚻᛖᚱᛖ ᛏᚻᛖ ᚾᛟᚱᛏᚻ ᚹᛁᚾᛞ ᛗᛖᛖᛏᛊ ᛏᚻᛖ ᛊᛖᚨ  
ᛏᚻᛖᚱᛖᛊ ᚨ ᚱᛁᛝᛖᚱ ᚠᚢᛚᛚ ᛟᚠ ᛗᛖᛗᛟᚱᚺ  
ᛊᛚᛖᛖᛈ ~~ᛁᚾᚷ ᛊᛈᛁᚱᛁᛏᛊ ᚨᚱᛖ ᚨᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ~~ my darling safe and sound  
ᚠᛟᚱ ᛁᚾ ᛏᚻᛁᛊ ᚱᛁᛝᛖᚱ ᚨᛚᛚ ᛁᛊ ᚠᛟᚢᚾᛞ

ᛁᚾ ᚻᛖᚱ ᚹᚨᛏᛖᚱᛊ ᛞᛖᛖᛈ ᚨᚾᛞ ᛏᚱᚢᛖ  
ᛚᛁᛖ ᛏᚻᛖ ᚨᚾᛊᚹᛖᚱᛊ ~~ᚠᛟᚱ ᚨ ᚷᚨᛚᛚᚨᚾᛏ ᚠᛖᚹ~~ and a path for you  
ᛞᛁᛝᛖ ᛞᛟᚹᚾ ᛞᛖᛖᛈ ᛁᚾᛏᛟ ᚻᛖᚱ ᛊᛟᚢᚾᛞ  
ᛟᚱ ᚾᛟᛏ ᛏᛟᛟ ᚠᚨᚱ᛬ ᛟᚱ ᚺᛟᚢᛚᛚ ᛒᛖ ᛞᚱᛟᚹᚾᛖᛞ

ᛊᚻᛖ ᚹᛁᛚᛚ ᛊᛁᚾᚷ ᚠᛟᚱ ᛏᚻᛟᛊᛖ ᚹᚻᛟ ᚻᛖᚨᚱ  
ᚨᚾᛞ ᛁᚾ ᚻᛖᚱ ᛊᛟᚾᚷ᛬ ᚨᛚᛚ ᛗᚨᚷᛁᛜ ᚠᛚᛟᚹᛊ  
~~ᚾᛟᚾᛖ ᛜᚨᚾ~~ can you ᛒᚱᚨᛝᛖ ᚹᚻᚨᛏ ~~ᛏᚻᛖᚺ~~ you ᛗᛟᛊᛏ ᚠᛖᚨᚱ  
~~ᛏᚻᛖᚺ ᛜᚨᚾᚾᛟᛏ~~ can you ᚠᚨᛜᛖ ᚹᚻᚨᛏ ᛏᚻᛖ ᚱᛁᛝᛖᚱ ᚲᚾᛟᚹᛊ

ᚹᚻᛖᚱᛖ ᛏᚻᛖ ᚾᛟᚱᛏᚻ ᚹᛁᚾᛞ ᛗᛖᛖᛏᛊ ᛏᚻᛖ ᛊᛖᚨ  
ᛏᚻᛖᚱᛖᛊ ᚨ ~~ᚱᛁᛝᛖᚱ~~ mother? ᚠᚢᛚᛚ ᛟᚠ ᛗᛖᛗᛟᚱᚺ  
~~ᛊᛚᛖᛖᛈᛁᚾᚷ ᛊᛈᛁᚱᛁᛏᛊ ᚨᚱᛖ ᚨᛒᛟᚢᚾᛞ~~ come my darling, homeward bound  
ᚹᚻᛖᚾ ᚨᛚᛚ ᛁᛊ ᛚᛟᛊᛏ᛬ ᛏᚻᛖᚾ ᚨᛚᛚ ᛁᛊ ᚠᛟᚢᚾᛞ

Something about the legible words is irritatingly familiar to Anna, but she can't seem to place them. She spends a good few minutes trying to fill in the rest, but in the end she just can't do it. It isn't until a lance of pain shoots behind her eyes that she realizes. She stands up as quickly as she can without stumbling into the shelves and rushes to the desk where Erik sits.

She slams the book down on top of the one the King is already reading, startling a yelp out of him.

"What was that for?" He looks anxious.

Anna sits next to him, pointing. "I found this with the fairy tales. I was getting distracted because the books you have us reading are so boring, and -"

"Wait, hold on," Erik interjects, "you agreed to this, I'm not making you do anything. There's no need to complain."

"Okay, sure whatever. Anyway, I'm trying to puzzle out this weird foreign writing, when I get a headache!" She gives her brother a meaningful look.

He looks at the book blankly for a long moment before meeting her eyes and speaking. "So, you've got a stress headache?"

"Erik." She tilts her head expectantly. "I got a headache out of nowhere from reading this poem."

Then he gets it. "Oh. Oh!" He looks down at the page, taking in its contents for the first time.

* * *

_"Gather close," says Iduna, leaning into the pillows on her eldest child's bed. "Skootch in. This is a song my own mother used to sing for me, and it's very important."_

_Erik's eyes lay on her knowingly; the Queen has always thought that there's something in those eyes that already knows the things they will see._

_"Where the north wind meets the sea,  
There's a river full of memory..."_

* * *

Anna sits on Erik's bed awkwardly. The layer of ice coating the room hasn't shown any signs of melting, so she sheets under her resist her weight rigidly, and the cold is spreading to her legs. Across the room, Erik is looking for a book on his bookshelf.

"This one!" he cries after a minute or two, holding a tome aloft like a sword from a stone. He hurries back to the bed and sits next to Anna and opens his book in his lap, next to where the storybook from the library sits in Anna's.

"This is it," he says. "A book of stories mother used to read to us. It has another copy of this song, written plainly." He points between the two, and it gives the redhead a headache to look at. But she powers through, taking in as much as her brain can retain.

She points between two corresponding lines. "This is her handwriting in the margins."

"And look," Erik adds, "she wrote the edited version in ours."

"Ours? It's in your room."

"Oh, right. Mine." He hesitates. "I really hope we can get your memory back, Anna. There's so much we've forgotten."

She frowns. It's unpleasant knowing that her memory has been changed, and terrifying that she can't actually figure out which parts are real and which aren't.

"So, you think this could be a lead?" She lets some of her worry into her voice.

The King idly turns a page. "I think it's a start. It means this lullaby is connected somehow, which means that mother-"

A folded piece of paper falls out from the newly turned page, thumping softly on an icy blue stripe of cold. Anna bends down first and picks it up, unfolding it.

"What is it?" Erik's voice is casually curious.

Anna looks up at him, eyes wide. "It's a map."


	6. The First Pieces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Erik remembers much, and encounters his sister's suitor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From here on, chapters won't switch point of view every single time. I need to be able to follow the story that's most relevant without cutting away and having to improvise. That said, I expect the next chapter will be from Anna's perspective.

Erik wakes as if with a weight on his chest. Another restless sleep full of memories he can't piece together. Images of Agnarr, of snow and ice and a wall of fog rising up like a dam, blocking sight as well as passage. And underneath it all, a song. Four notes that he can barely remember upon waking.

Why these dreams upset him so, he cannot fathom. Certainly, having one's memory slowly trickling back should be cause for celebration? Even if it does fill him with dread to realize that Agnarr -- that _Iduna_ \-- would subject him to that kind of blanking of the mind. So he hays for a time, pondering. Why has his memory returned and not Anna's? What blocks her mind that has shattered in his? He stays thus until the sun rises, his heart dreading sleep more than his body craves it -- but only barely.

He emerges from his room hours before he knows Anna will emerge from her rooms and makes for the gates to the castle, carrying the book of poetry under his arm. _I went through all the trouble of opening up the castle, I suppose I should actually leave the damn place once or twice._

When the guards see him approaching, they bow silently and open the massive double doors. He emerges like a flower blooming: slowly, cautiously, and like a revelation. The sight of the sun rising above the buildings around him strips the breath from him, and a feeling of profound refreshment washes over his limbs. He picks up his pace, wandering the streets for a long while to see his city come awake.

He buys a pastry from an old woman whose skin is as dark as he is pale, and is delighted to find it baked-in with little chunks of chocolate. Along the docks, he greets a handful of noblemen boarding their ships for departure. One couple in particular catches his attention, and he speeds up in order to meet them before they board.

"Princess Rapunzel!" He waves her down, but her partner, a man who, despite his dress, looks at home on a wanted poster, notices the King first. He elbows the Princess, earning a look, but she looks where he points.

Her face lights up. "King Erik! You're up early. And down at the docks, no less. To what do we owe the honor?"

A pang of... something hits Erik, but he can't place it. he ignores it and speaks. "Nothing urgent, I promise. I simply wanted to give you a more formal greeting. I know I left the coronation rather abruptly, and I would hate to snub the children of my parents' closest friends. How have you enjoyed the hospitality of Arendelle?"

"I gotta say, the lobster could've been better." This comes from Rapunzel's partner, and Erik sees a smirk on the man's face. Before he can decide whether to glare imposingly, the Princess does it for him.

"Come on, Eugene, you loved your stay and you know it."

He relents. "You're right, I did. It was marvelous, your Grace. How do you even get lobster this far north?"

"Ignore him," Rapunzel continues to Eirk. "He makes great fun out of irritating royalty, despite his recent rise in rank."

Erik Chuckles. "I'm glad you have fun in the Courts, Eugene. I envy you the opportunity." He looks back to Rapunzel. "Anna won't be up for a while, so she can't say goodbye, but I know you two used to be close. Don't be afraid to write, I know she'll be eager to get in touch again."

"Oh don't you worry, I found her before we even made it to the ballroom and we made sure to catch up. But thank you, Erik." She takes one of his hands in both hers and smiles warmly. "I'ts good to see you after all these years. You write too, okay?"

The King is taken aback. The warmth is surprising to him. _Surely I've given them an offense by ignoring them for so many years?_ But he shakes himself; he isn't about to look a minor miracle like this in the mouth. "Of course, your Majesty. I eagerly await setting pen to paper."

"Now don't be too enthusiastic, your Grace, I'm a married woman." Rapunzel winks. Erik blushes. Eugene laughs.

"I'm kidding! It's been good to see you, Erik. But we have to go; the captain of our ship won't hesitate to cut off our fingers for making him wait." She gives a perfect curtsie, and the King bows in return before waving them off.

The King spends another hour wandering about the capital city before finally finding a shady spot beneath a tree. He sits on the grass rather ungracefully, leaning his back against a tree. It isn't nearly as comfortable as he had hoped, but the shade is nice, and he has some quiet, so he takes it. He opens up the book to the page with the altered poem, and where he and Anna had stored the map the night before. It sits folded over the runic text, as if waiting for him. He takes to it with less vigor than one might expect; in truth, he is fearful of what he might find should he follow where it leads.

Looking at the stylized depiction of his Kingdom, he studies the various markings dotted about. Namely, the shape at the end of the path opposite the black star marking the capital; it's the silhouette of a human, or something human-like. It's squat and round and has hair that sticks up like a tuft of grass. It almost looks like a picture of a rock troll from a storybook.

Near the top of the map, there's some scribbled writing that he hadn't noticed before. He gives it a closer look, and is filled with dread as a sharp pain shoots through his head, and he knows another memory is coming.

* * *

_Erik sits in his mother's lap, and she sits on his bed. She's singing to him._

"Dive down deep into her sound,

But not too far, or you'll be drowned."

_Looking over, he sees little Anna, hair all red, sleeping under Iduna's other arm._

"But can you brave what you most fear?

Can you face what the river knows?"

_"Mama, why are lullabies always about scary things like drowning?"_

_Iduna looks at him with an expression of amusement. "A good question, Ẹ̶̙̬̥͍̌̽͑́̇͂͛͒̚͜ḽ̴̩̤͍̋͛́͋̂̈̈́͠ṣ̵̲̞̒͛ą̷̺̑! I'm afraid I don't know why that is."_

_Except, she doesn't call him Erik. When she says his name, she says something else, something he can't quite hear._

"Iduna!" _Agnarr's voice cracks like a whip, and Anna wakes with a start. "I thought we'd discussed this."_

_Mother looks at him flatly. "I'm not going to start ignoring my ḍ̸̙̃ä̴͇̲̪́͛͑̐͆̓ǔ̸̬͓͖͈̭̲ͅg̶̮̩̙̋h̴̗͖͕̽͝t̴̡̝̪͂͘ͅẻ̷̠͚̌͒̔̚r̴̗͉̭̿͌̈́͑́͆͜'̸̠͖͓̈́̎s̵̛̜̑̈́̏̈́̄̍̕͜͝ wishes because of this kingdom's traditions, Agnarr."_

_They keep fighting, but Erik ignores them. Something is wrong. He can't quite make out her words. It's as if the memory isn't complete; there's something missing._

_Suddenly, the memory changes. Erik's sight drifts up, away from the body in Iduna's arms. Suddenly, he's next to me, on the scene from the outside. He tries to look my way, but he wakes before he can see._

* * *

Erik starts upward, squinting. The sun has moved, and he's not in the shade anymore. A voice is speaking.

"... goodness, your Grace. I was about to call for help. Are you well?" Looking up, Erik sees the red hair of Hans, Anna's new friend from the coronation. He stands tall, and his shadow is rather intimidating.

Erik stands slowly, feeling stiff as if he's fallen asleep on a chair. "I'm fine, Your Majesty. Thank you."

Hans smiles, a perfectly polite smile. It raises Erik's hackles.

"How are you enjoying the city, Hans?"

"Your kingdom is beautiful, your Grace. I come from far south, so this is only the second time I've ever seen snow, even from a distance. You must be a tough people to weather it as you do."

"We do well enough," Erik concedes. "If i may ask, how did you find me?"

Hans looks taken aback. "I apologize, your majesty, but I wasn't looking for-"

"I don't mean that, your Majesty." Erik gestures to the ground, where the book lies open. "What was my state when you came across me?"

"Ah." Hans seems anxious. "If you'll forgive a man for eavesdropping, Your Grace, you seemed to be talking in your sleep."

Erik doesn't bother to hide his suspicion. "What was I saying?"

Hans balks, the perfect image of a prince attempting to appease a superior.

"You were saying a name, Grace." He swallows nervously. "It was something like... Elise? Ellie? Ë̵̮́̽̈́l̵̝̭̀̾̎̀͘̚s̸̞͉̹͖͎͎̲̓͊̏̚ͅͅa̸̖͎͔̣̙̣͈̜͋̀̉͝?"

"Pardon me, what was that last?"

"Ȩ̵̧͙͇͍͇̫͛͆̈̅̆̉̈́l̷̬̈́̿̋͋̏͂̏s̴̳͇̬͇͖̑̍̋a̸͈͆̇̔̄̈́͊̈́͠͠, sir. Is she someone you know, your Grace?" His face shows a mask of polite curiosity.

The King shakes his head. "No, I'm afraid not. Thank you, Hans, but I must be on my way."

"Your Grace," Hans interjects as the King bends to pick up the map and book, "I was actually hoping to ask something of you, as a humble guest of Arendelle."

Erik barely bothers to hide his grimace as he straightens. "What can I do for you, Your Majesty?"

"I was hoping I might have your blessing to pay Princess Anna a visit? I haven't seen her since the night of the coronation, and I'm afraid I may have offended her somehow."

_I'm sure you are,_ the King thinks. But he holds his tonuge. _Anna isn't mine to command. I have no place to deny her this._

"She's in the castle, so far as I know. Would you like me to walk you there?"

"I would greatly appreciate such a kindness, Your Grace."

Extending some more social noise the prince's way, Erik sets off to the castle, folding the map back to its previous hiding place in the book. He takes care not to look at the writing at the top; he finds that he doesn't particularly want to know what it says at the moment.

* * *

Erik isn't surprised to find Anna in the library frantically pulling books off of shelves. As he approaches, he can hear her muttering to herself. He opens his mouth to greet her, but Hans speaks first.

"Princess," he starts with a tone of relief, "it's good to see you." She turns at the noise, and straightens up hastily when she sees the redheaded man.

"Oh, Hans! What a pleasant surprise! I was just, um. Looking for something."

Erik lifts the book in front of him so that she can see, and her shoulders relax.

"Sorry," says the King, "I should have left a note." He places the book on a table.

Anna looks between them rather awkwardly. "Well, Hans, Erik and I did have plans for how to spend our day. Did you need something?"

"I only wanted to check on the state of things," the prince assures her. "After the night of the coronation, I was afraid I may have caused offence."

Anna laughs. "No, not at all! Something... else came up is all. I had to attend to some matters of the realm with the new King. I promise you haven't wronged me."

"That's good to hear." The prince smiles, and Erik can see his sister blush. "Well, if you have business to attend to, I won't keep you. I expect I have to get ready to depart, anyway." Anna looks downcast at this news, then looks thoughtful. "You're welcome to browse the library if you like! And I can help you pack tomorrow, if you like."

"Shouldn't you gain the King's blessing first?" Erik raises an eyebrow.

Anna gives her brother a flat look. "Don't you tell me you've become traditional like father these years. I'll go where I like, thank you very much."

Erik laughs. _She's so much like Mother._ "You're right, I apologize. Feel free to look around, Prince Hans, and make sure you don't overwork my sister. I need her for important work."

Hans bows deeply, not breaking his composure. "Thank you, Your Grace. If you'll permit me, I think I'll take this as my cue to leave the royal family to their work."

Erik nods, and Hans turns to wander among the aisles.


	7. A Name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the siblings find a clue to one mystery in the deepening of another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is short. The next one will be long.
> 
> I accidentally posted this chapter before it was done, whoops. It should be finished by the time you read this.

"I had another memory while I was out today," Erik starts, not wasting a moment. "I looked more closely at the map and something triggered it."

"What was it?" Anna sits next to him at the table. The King opens the book to the page where the map is stored, but hesitates before unfolding it.

"I'ts okay," Anna says, laying a hand on his arm. "I'm here if it happens again."

He smiles at his sister. "Thank you." He unfolds the map, and points to the writing on the topmost margin. It reads only a few words;

_For Elsa and Anna -- I know you will find the truth again._

Anna finds her eyes watering. Despite the fact that she doesn't know what the writing means, she knows her mother's handwriting, and the thought of her mother leaving something for her fills her with a distant warmth. Then, she processes the name next to hers. _Elsa... Why is that name familiar?_ She looks up and finds Erik's face contorted by something resembling worry -- or is that confusion?

"What's wrong?"

Erik seems to start out of his reverie. "I... What does it say?"

"What?" _Has he forgotten how to read?_

"The names. I see yours, but the other is missing. I can't read it. It's like there's ink spilled on the page."

"It looks fine to me. It says 'Elsa.'" At this, her brother's brows furrow further.

He shakes his head. "What was that?"

This takes Anna aback. "Wait, is this what caused the memory?"

He nods. "I think something is blocking the name from me. It's different than the memory loss, though. It's like... a veil. Frosted glass between me and it."

"Well, I can tell you one thing: It isn't your name, and I don't think I've ever met an Elsa. Then again, it has a familiar ring to it."

"Gods, it's strange when you do that."

Anna blinks, then realizes. "Oh, sorry! It's strange to think you can't hear it."

Erik laughs. "It's strange to not hear it. Who do you think they could be?"

"She."

"Sorry?"

"The name, it's a woman's."

"Oh, right. Well, regardless. Mother mentioned you too -- who do you think she might be?"

Anna shakes her head. "I have no idea. She's not one of the staff, and no Elsa came to the coronation as far as I can remember."

The King thinks for a long moment. "Well, we can ask the castle staff if they've ever heard of her. Until then, I had a thought."

"What's up, buttercup?"

Erik gives her a look before continuing. "I think we should take a journey out to here." He points to the drawing of the stout figure up north of the capital.

The thought had occurred to the Princess; clearly their mother had left this for her, and whoever this Elsa person is, and there's only one other clear marking on the paper. The obvious thing to do would be to go straight there.

"I think you're right," she says, nodding. "Day after tomorrow?"

Erik sputters. "Tomorrow? That's... quite a quick turn around, Anna."

"Well, why not?" _No reason to dally,_ she reasoned.

"I just... my coronation was days ago, Anna. I understand the enthusiasm, but I'd like at least a few more days to settle into the job. And, you know..." he trailed off, looking away. "Spend time in the city."

Anna had to hold back a delighted squeal. The thought of her brother getting out of the castle, meeting people... she could think of little that made her happier. _He deserves as much sunlight as anyone._

"Okay," she says. "A few days. But honestly, I don't want to go much longer knowing there's years of lost memories floating around up here." She taps her temple.

Erik smiles. "You have a point. I don't envy your position, as unpleasant as the flashes can be." He folds up the map with his gloved hands. "It's good to see you, Anna, but I do have Kingly duties to which to attend. Go, spend some time with your suitor."

"Suitor? Who are you talking about?"

"Come now, You can't tell me you haven't noticed."

Anna just shakes her head. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Hans?" The idea sends a flush to Anna's ears. _Could he really be...?_ It wasn't out of the realm of possibility, she supposed. He was always polite and distant, and he had sought her out today seemingly just to make sure he hadn't done her wrongly.

"Oh." She didn't quite know what to make of the idea. Then, she smiled. "I suppose I will. Maybe we'll have an heir on the way before you manage." She gave a wink she hoped wasn't too suggestive.

"Oh, Anna, please!" Erik's tone was pleading, and his face was a deep red. "I have no desire to know your intentions-"

Anna interrupted him with a guffawing laugh that had her nearly falling out of her chair. "You're so serious, Erik! I'm only kidding. He's nice, and I'll admit he's pretty, but for now at least he's just a kind visitor from the far south. Nothing more." She stood, smiling. "But regardless, I'll take you up on that. It's nice out today and I don't want to miss it."

* * *

The sun shines down on the two redheaded heirs as they walk along a path along the coast, some ways from the docks of the city. One, a tall man with a well-crafted smile, speaks in animated tones. The other, a green-clad Princess, listens with wrapt attention.

"... for an entire _year,_ " he says. "It had to have taken some serious planning."

Anna shakes her head incredulously. "I'm sorry, that's a little much to believe."

"It's true!" The Prince says emphatically. "They managed to get Friedrich in on it for about a week, but he gave up after I hit him over the head with a picture frame over the matter."

"You didn't!"

"I did! I won't defend it, but I did! I was fed up, and David & Renee were bigger than me so I couldn't take them on without incurring the consequences."

Anna nods solemnly. "I know how that feels."

"Really?" Hans looks curiously at the Princess, but she doesn't notice. "I wouldn't place His Grace for the rough-housing sort."

"He wasn't, not really," she replies. "Most of the time, he wanted to play at fantasy stories. He had one that he would always insist on, about a warrior queen from the east. I swear, he kept sticks hidden around the courtyard that he could use as swords."

Hans laughs. "Really? Why would the King play at being a woman?"

"You know, I really don't know," she says, considering. "He certainly hasn't grown up the heroic type, and he's not a Queen, so far as I'm aware."

The Prince shrugs. "If you don't mind my saying, your Majesty, your brother strikes me as a little odd." He pauses just long enough to gauge his companion's reaction before continuing, noting her eye him warily. "Not that he seems unfit as a King, mind, or neglectful as family! Simply that he seems..." He trails off mysteriously. On cue, the Princess picks up her line.

"He seems what?" Her voice carries an edge now; she'll defend her brother, and she wants her maybe-suitor to know it.

Hans takes a moment before answering. "I apologize, My Lady. I don't mean to imply anything slanderous. But I did see something earlier today that worried me. I came upon your brother laying on the ground, shaking something fierce, and mumbling as if in a dream."

The suspicion leaves Anna's eyes, replaced by worry and understanding. "I understand. I'm sorry you had to see it. I know of his... incidents. They're not serious, but they happen from time to time."

The two redheads walk in an uncomfortable silence for another moment before the Prince continues. "I didn't mean to, but... I did hear what he was saying."

"What was it?"

He looks uncomfortable. "It was a name. Elsa."

Anna is silent for nearly the rest of their walk.


	8. An Attempt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Erik ponders for a time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It turns out, turning Hans into a compelling villain is hard. No matter; he isn't what this series is about anyway.

Erik sits at the chair of his office, pondering whether or not to try using the magic. _It would be a horribly mundane first use of this ability,_ he thinks. The heat of the King's office makes him feel like he's trying to breathe under a tick blanket. The room is lined with high bookshelves filled nearly to bursting with tomes covering all sorts of relevant topics; legers, lists of knights, lords, and lands, and histories explaining treaties and rivalries. All the references a new King might need, if he has missed several years of learning to rule. Combined with the dark wooden walls, floor, and thick wooden double doors, the room is heavily insulated against air flow, meaning the open window at the back of the room is all the ventilation Erik is likely to get.

So he sits at his heavy, drawer-laden desk, looking at his naked hands, and ponders. _It might be a good opportunity to learn a little more about how it works. Can I cool the room without frosting everything around me? Can I melt it after it's made, or do I have to wait it out like anything else?_ These and many other questions rumble about his mind. Eventually, he makes a decision. _No harm in trying._ He extends his hands, closing his eyes and searching for the tingling feeling in his chest. He finds it eventually, and lets out a slow breath, letting it move along his arms and into his fingers. Opening his eyes, he sees tiny little puffs of mist, like storm clouds, flitting about his hands. He can feel the cold as the water in the air around him condenses and freezes, but it doesn't seep beneath the skin. It's as if the cold is coming from him instead of from the outside world. He smiles; something about letting the power flow out of him makes his heart flutter. It's like breathing in fresh air after living in a crypt. He laughs -- a small sound at first, then a chuckle. Then, it changes. His voice seems to grow higher, the laugh coming from his heart more than his stomach. It's no Kingly sound, but the sound of a child, high and delighted. Or, more accurately -- well. We know how it sounds. He is filled with a joy that is so distant, so dusty and unused, that he doesn't actually understand what it is when he begins feeling it. If he closes his eyes now, he will see me, as clearly as he used to hear his own name. He thinks he hears a note, sung by-

But he is interrupted. A knock comes at the door, and when the King flinches, there is a sound like rippling water, and suddenly there are two jagged spikes of white ice jutting out from the floor, their tips ending less than an inch from his palms. What's more, the mist around his hands spreads, and he can see snowflakes forming in the fog. He tries to reign in the power, but to no avail; the spikes only grow, and a thin frost spreads outward from where they meet the floor, sprouting little spines of ice, like thorny sprigs. He panics, and the spreading speeds up, heeded on. _My gloves._ He has the idea without even thinking it; it simply comes to him as if it was trained into him. He turns, frigid power still arcing out of his fingertips, ans snatches his gloves off of the desk. He slides them on, and instantly the flow recedes up, back into him, and fades as it always does after an incident. No frost even touches the cloth on his palms.

The knock comes again. "Your Grace, the meal you ordered is ready in the north dining hall. Anna wants me to tell you she won't be joining you, as she is entertained by Prince Hans this afternoon." The voice belongs to Kai.

"Coming," Erik calls distractedly, thinking. He notes that Kai has been serving the Arendelle Royal Family since before he was born. _He likely has as much knowledge of the Kingdom's doings as father did, in his day._ After a moment, he looks at the pillars of ice protruding from the floor. _Does he know of this?_ He stays still for another long moment. Then, almost hesitantly, he makes for the door.

When the King leaves, he is careful to only open the door enough to let himself through, not enough to let the manservant see inside. Despite his efforts, Kai looks uncomfortable when the door opens. "Is something the matter, Kai?" asks the King dutifully.

"Nothing, your Grace. I only got a shiver of cold just now."

* * *

Erik eats most of his meal in a silence that sits somewhere between discomfort and intent. He knows he wants to ask Kai about the name, but he knows he can't. The fact eats at him; it makes him feel rather useless. _I get these memories, access to what was lost, and suddenly there's something new being hidden from me. Just my luck._ The thought takes his mind away from the old servant and to the name itself. The void in his perception. _It's different than before,_ he knows. _But how?_ He considers the only possibility he can think of: that there is some kind of magic afoot. It's clear that whatever has changed his and Anna's memories is supernatural. Likely, they will find answers at the destination on the map. But this is different than that; the name doesn't cause him any pain. He simply can't seem to perceive it at all. That, and Anna seems unaffected, which means it probably isn't the same enchantment.

_Which means that I might have a connection to this person that Anna doesn't._ That thought sends him down a new path: _What if it has something to do with my powers?_ That makes good sense. If this person is related to the ice magic in some way, it may explain a lot. _A child manifests a wintery curse, the King wipes the memories of his children to hide it away, and keeps the effected child away from whoever might know about it, including this... person._ He wonders if this person is who put them upon him. Then, he connects a final dot: If he can't ask Kai about this mysterious person, he can ask him about something else.

He waits until Kai enters several minutes later. When the old man is clearing the dishes from in front of the King, the white-haired man speaks up.

"Kai," he begins. "I was wondering if I might ask you a few questions about Agnarr and Iduna." Kai freezes for only a moment, taken aback. Then he gathers himself.

"Of course, your Grace." He stacks a champagne glass on a plate. "Shall I meet you in your office to talk?"

Erik considers saying no, thinking of the mess he left. But he has no reason not to trust the old man, and he reasons it likely that he might know already.

"Yes. Meet me in half an hour."

* * *

Back in the office, Erik paces. He finds himself nervous. What if Kai doesn't know about the magic, and tells the staff? What if he does know, and the truth is somehow horrible? He finds his hands shaking, although somehow the gloves seem to be keeping the magic at bay. He looks out the window, seeing the courtyard in the light of the setting sun. Some birds flutter about the trees, and he decides to open the window to hear them sing. Then, he turns into the room. The two spikes of ice sit, seemingly untouched. _They don't seem to have melted at all._ He wonders if it ever will, or if he'll need to find a way to get rid of it himself.

There comes a knock at the door, and he knows it's Kai. He walks to the doors, taking a deep breath before opening them.

"Ah, hello Kai. Come in." Erik watches the servant closely as he enters the office. Kai looks upon the spikes for a half second before his eyes grow wide.

"Your Grace, what is this?" He makes a good approximation of confusion and hesitance. But Erik can see that it's feigned.

"I don't blame you for lying," the King begins. "But Kai, this you've been working for my family since before I was born. You've seen me grow up. And you're not an unintelligent man." He gives the old man a plain, honest look. "Please, Kai. I'm only trying to understand."

The man's shoulder slump. "I apologize, your Grace. It has been so long... I thought I might never see this magic again."

"Well, you have. And it's part of what I wish to talk to you about. Please, sit." The King makes his way around the desk, but does not sit. He's too anxious.

He begins slowly, careful to keep his voice gentle. "The night of the coronation, something strange happened to me. I was... overwhelmed by seeing Anna again, and with being around so many people after so long. You'll remember I fled to my rooms, and something happened. This," he gestures to the pillars of ice, "happened. And... I remembered. Or, began to. It would seem that mine and Anna's memories of the past several years have been altered somehow. We don't know what all has been changed, or how, or why. But I've pieced together that my mother and father had something to do with it, and that it's related to this magic.

"I wanted to talk to you, not as your King, and not to accuse you of anything nefarious, but to sort things out for myself and my sister. You're a good man, Kai; you've served us for longer than I've been alive. I simply want whatever answers you can provide."

Kai nods slowly and silently. He waits a while, thinking about his answer. He seems conflicted. _No doubt father gave him some order about staying silent about this. But Agnarr is gone._ Eventually, the old servant seems to make up his mind. He speaks tiredly and worriedly.

"When you were born, your Grace, we knew immediately that you were special. Your hair has always been as white as it is now, and your eyes as blue. And it wasn't long before the magic began manifesting. You would grow so cold when you were upset that your Queen mother would have to swaddle you in twice the normal number of blankets just to hold you safely.

"When you grew old enough to talk, your parents began noticing other differences. You seemed to think of yourself... differently."

Something about that last part sets off a spark in Erik's mind. For some reason, it brings to mind the name that he can't hear.

"Differently in what way?"

Kai hesitates. "Well, your Grace, it's rather complicated. You began insisting after Anna was born that..." he trailed off, and his eyes focused on something behind Erik. "I apologize, Grace, but is there something...?"

Erik turns to see what his servant sees. Sure enough, there is a shadow, slightly darker than those around it, nestled in a thick tree branch. He squints, and as his eyes adjust he makes out the shape of a person crouched there. He stands confused for a moment before the pieces click into place. It's just in time, too; he ducks the instant something buzzes past where his head just was, and the figure drops out of the tree, out of sight. Erik's blood rushes loudly in his ears, and he can't think through the fear. He tries to move, but he's frozen in place. Frost coats the floor around him, sticking his chair in place.

After a long minute, he is calm enough to speak. "Kai?"

There is no response. He waits a moment before trying again. "Kai?"

Still, nothing. The King tries to stand, though his legs are shaking so badly he wonders if the'll fall apart underneath him. He dreads what he will see on the other side of the desk. And his dread is confirmed. An arrow sprouts from the chest of the old servant, and the blood, having soaked through the layers of his clothing, is pooling about him. In the red-orange light of the setting sun, it reflects like the embers of a dying fire. There are no thoughts in the mind of Arendelle's monarch as he falls to his knees. There is only a ripple of cold that covers everything in a sheet of slick, solid ice.

* * *

_"Have you chosen, my love?" Iduna smiles down at her oldest daughter._

_The little girl nods enthusiastically. "I have!"_

_The woman scoops up her child lovingly, and they both giggle. They are warm, together. "Then tell me, little one, so I can call you by it!"_

_The child plays coy at first, hoping to be mysterious. It doesn't work; she only works herself up. "My name is Elsa!"_

_This catches Iduna off guard, but she doesn't let her daughter see._ Of all the names you could have chosen, my love.

_"I love it. And I love you, Elsa, my dearest, my little snowflake. I'm so proud of you. Now, would you like to go tell_ Anna?"

* * *

It feels as if years have passed before Erik has the presence of mind to rise. Should he look out the window, he will realize that only minutes have gone by, and the sun has yet to vanish into the sea. But he does not. He has only one thought: _Find Anna._ He walks slowly, heavily from the office and down the hallway. He does not trail blood behind him, as ice does not stick to the bottom of shoes as liquid blood does. Instead, he leaves footprints of snow behind him -- snow that does not melt. He does not realize that his body is covered in spines of ice the color of frosted glass, so sharp that they leave no fraying where they cut through his clothes. He does not realize that his form is obscured by a cloud that produces jagged, malformed snowflakes that flutter to the ground angrily. He only walks, seeking his sister.


	9. Pieces Moving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there is a storm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next few chapters are something I've been looking forward to.
> 
> A NOTE: After some consideration on why I'm writing this fic and how I want to portray these characters, I've decided to include some story elements and character dynamics that might very well squick you. As such, I HIGHLY recommend you read through ALL of the tags before reading this chapter, or the rest of the fic for that matter. No hard feelings if the direction or content herein makes you uncomfortable; I hope you enjoyed what you read so far, and that you find other fics that are more to your preferences out there. Thank you so much for reading. <3  
> -Sabrina

She sees the cold moving through the town. It comes like a stormcloud, shifting and roiling as it pours over and around buildings and trees. She isn't the first to see it; it's brought to her attention by someone gasping nearby as she carries an armload of bags from Hans' opulent rooms. She knows what it is when she sees it; her brother is in trouble. So she drops the bags and runs out the door, chasing the thickest part of the cloud.

Crossing into the grey feels like stepping into late autumn; she feels the heat of the evening drop away, and she can see dew forming and freezing on parts of her dress. It takes but a handful of minutes before she rounds a corner. She can barely see anything ahead of her down the alleyway, besides the falling snow and fog, but soon enough, she sees... someone.

In truth, she sees me. I'm not sure how she does, but her eyes focus on me, her brow furrows. I'm not the shape she's expecting. Unfortunately for upcoming events, I'm just that to her; a shape. She doesn't have the necessary perspective to understand any more than that. As she approaches, my silhouette fades, and his shape emerges in my place. Or rather, the shape of his power does. He's so covered in ice now that she can hardly tell it's him. But she's able to intuit; can't imagine anyone else has wandered into this fog.

"Erik?" She doesn't need to raise her voice. The storm is eerily silent, and her voice carries like the call of a horn across flat water. To her surprise, he stops and turns his head towards her. She comes closer still, and she can make out the sheets of ice clinging to him like armour, the spines jutting out from his limbs at awkward angles. He looks like a corpse. His eyes are empty, cloudy almost like with rheumatism. She realizes when she's close enough to touch him that the magic is in his eyes. Coming _out_ of his eyes. The fog is rolling from them, pooling on the ground and mingling with the larger storm, pouring from them like tears.

"Erik, are you okay? What happened?" She can hear the panic in her voice. _Keep calm. He needs you right now, for whatever reason._ "Can you hear me?"

His voice strains to escape his throat. He sounds like a teapot. "As.."

He coughs, and snowflakes come from his mouth. "Assa... Assassins." The act of speaking seems to clear his eyes somewhat, but the fugue doesn't leave him.

"What!? Did someone try to kill you?" He nods, seemingly unaffected by the now open distress in her voice. She freezes, processing this new information. _What does this mean? Who's sending assassins to kill him? Am I in danger too? How do we deal with assassins?_ The questions overwhelm her for a moment before she takes a breath. _We can deal with that when my brother isn't turning himself into a glacier._

She looks him in the eyes. Really looks at him. She knows he doesn't see her as such; he's lost to the storm. _Come on, Anna, think._ _How do you help your brother thaw the magic ice he creates when he's upset? It can't be that hard, right?_ The thinks back to the last time he had an episode like this. _It just kept getting stronger and stronger until whatever was blocking his memory broke and he passed out. But it probably wouldn't be a good idea to knock him out._

In her pondering, she doesn't notice the gathering crowd, fighting their way through the fog to its source. She doesn't hear the whispering grow into loud conversation. She doesn't see Hans at the front, staring intently. But she does hear it when he calls to her.

"Princess Anna, what's going on? Are you alright?" She jumps, whirling to see the red-haired Prince standing a few steps beyond the body of the crowd. His face shows worry.

He continues, his voice carrying what sounds like a noble calmness. "What's this storm? Is that... My Gods, is that the King?" The crowd responds before Anna can, and the murmur moves like a ripple away from the epicenter, outward who knows how far. "The King... Demon of Ice and Snow... The Princess..."

"Hans, thank goodness! Get the people away from here while I fix this! It's a long story, and I promise I'll explain, but for now we just need to get the people to safety!" She looks as pleadingly as she can into his eyes. "Please."

He pauses for a long moment. But not too long; he knows what he has to do. He turns to the crowd, straightening slightly and assuming an authoritative tone. "Everyone, please come with me! We must trust the King and Princess to sort all this out, but for now your safety is their top priority." He begins slowly shepherding the mass of people away, even as they continue to talk amongst themselves. Anna turns back to Erik; nothing much has changed that she can see, so she sets back to thinking. _I might as well see how responsive he is._

"Hey Erik," she begins, "can you hear me?" She looks closely at his eyes, and she can see his head nod slowly.

She continues in a calm, low voice. "Good, that's good. Do you know where you are? You're in the middle of the city. You walked out here, and you're kind of... carrying a storm with you." She swallows. "Listen, I know something happened to you, and I promise we'll figure it out. But for now, we need to get rid of this storm." She keeps looking at his eyes for any sign that things are clearing up. It isn't, but the clouds coming from them are coming more slowly.

"Can you see me?" He shakes his head. "Okay. Well, I'm right in front of you now. You're in the space between some buildings. There's a lot of open space around you, so you don't need to worry about tripping. But we don't have to go anywhere. In fact, we can stay here and work things out." He nods again, a little more noticeably.

"Good," she continues. "I'm gonna grab your hand, okay? I'm right here for you, so I'm gonna hold you right to this spot till you can see again." At these words, the snow noticeably thins. Anna can see as the flakes fall more slowly, and she smiles. "That's right, I'm right here for you, no matter what. I know this is scary, but I'm not gonna leave you, okay?" She waits a long, worrying moment before he nods.

She pauses before she goes on. "So, I think I know what we can do, but I don't think you're going to like it." Erik's brows furrow so slightly she might have missed it if she hadn't been inches away. "It's not going to hurt, at least I don't think it is. But it's gonna be... well, you remember when you first got your memory back?"

He doesn't move. Somehow, she knows he sees where this is going.

"Well, we might need to do that again. Unless you're sure you can calm the storm yourself, we need to trigger another blast. If past experience is anything to go by, that should dissipate the storm, at least for a while." She stops to look at the storm around her, checking if it's gotten worse. That seems like a better way to monitor his state than squinting at his half-covered face. "Is that okay? We won't do anything you don't want to do."

It's an agonizing moment before Anna sees a change. At first, she thinks he might not hear her. Then, she sees him shaking.

"Oh no. Erik, are you okay? I'm sorry, I didn't mean-" Then, she stumbles. Looking down, she can see a jagged stalagmite of cloudy ice jutting up from the cobbled street. She backs away slowly, seeing the signs of the storm worsening around her. _Oh no. Oh, no no no. I've just made everything so much worse, haven't I?_

The snow begins falling more heavily, and the air, up until now eerily still, blusters into chill wind. There is a muffled cracking and grinding as the cobbles of the street are pushed upward by more icy spikes. Erik, who has stilled, clenches a fist, breaking off tiny chunks of ice that have built up on his knuckles. Around him, fog and snow swirl inward, collecting in a drift about his body. It's as if the storm is being called back into his body. Even the fog pouring from his eyes doesn't bother to fall to the floor before spiraling around his arms. The storm builds and builds, and soon Anna realizes she's lost sight of her brother, and she can only see the snow now. Except she can see something else in the blizzard. Somehow, she sees me again. But only for a moment.

Then, two things happen at once. Anna, seeing me again, feels a spike of pain in her head as her memories are blocked again, and she falls to a knee, eyes closed. Simultaneously, the storm suddenly quiets, and the magic swirling about the air is sucked suddenly back into my body -- and his. Then, as if in the releasing of a breath, it lances out from the King in a circle, and wherever the lances strike, spikes sprout like some kind of wintry seed. One narrowly misses Anna's head, instead cracking the stone of the fountain behind her.

The sound forces her eyes open, and she gasps. Every surface she can see is coated in thick, bristly frost. There is no more fog, and no more snow falls from the sky. The street, once flat, now resembles a lake frozen mid-storm, with ripples and waves crisscrossing its surface. At their peaks there are spikes like before, reaching upwards like skeletal hands, grasping the stones to pull their colossal bodies from the earth. For the first time, the Princess is able to see the true, terrifying power her brother wields. It sits in her heart, heavy. She knows she should be filled with fear. She knows she should be losing her trust in her brother by the second. But she isn't. She has only one thought: _I have to keep him safe._

* * *

_The hall is quiet. The night lays thick about the castle, and the adjacent rooms of the royal children are still like death. Then, there is movement. A figure in a rich nightgown hurries as silently as they can down the hallway, stopping at the first door on her right. She pauses, looking uncertain. Then she knocks._

_"El- Erik, it's your mother. May I come in?"_

_A long moment of silence. then, a muffled voice. "Yes."_ Her voice is so deep, _thinks Iduna sadly. She opens the door._

_Inside, she sees her, sitting on the edge of her bed. Her back is straight as always, plain with a pain hidden so deep that she herself cannot feel it. Only the world can feel it, now._

_"How are you?"_

_She doesn't look up at her mother. "I'm fine."_

_More silence. "You know you can talk to me? You don't have to, but-"_

_"I know." Elsa's voice is sharp, like a broken branch. Not cutting, but tearing. "I'm fine."_

_Iduna holds back tears when she finally speaks again. "I love you, E-Erik. I just want you to know that. And I'm proud of you, no matter what. You're stronger than you know."_

_Her daughter looks confused. "Are you okay, mother?"_

_She begins to nod, then stops suddenly, considering._ This is why she hides from me, I suppose.

_"May I touch you, Erik?"_

_She nods, a small thankful smile blessing her face. She reaches out and lays a hand gently upon her cheek. And suddenly, she cannot hold back the tears anymore._

_"I'm so sorry, my love. I'm so sorry for what I've let happen to you."_

_The confusion on her face grows more severe. "Mother, what-"_

_But she cannot finish. Her mother has collapsed, sobbing, onto her chest. Between hiccoughs and sobs, she can hear the Queen saying something. Closing her eyes, she listens closely._

_"E̴͍̞͗̑̂̌̋́ḽ̴̢̧̻̹̖͕͙̠͎̲̻̗́̋̉s̶͚̱͈̈́̈͋͐̊̓̾͛̓̓͂̿̊ͅä̴̺̰̤͈͌͐́̄͂̿̌̑̃͌̓͜͝͝, please, I'm sorry... I'm so sorry E̸͙̠͎̝̗̮̫̿́ͅl̵̙̓̊̓́̊̈́̓̒͘s̶͎̤͚̀͊̀͌̿̂͑̓a̸̛͍̖͎͙͌͐͋̑̀̋̑͊̽... Please forgive me..."_

_"Mother? What are you saying? I can't hear you."_

_Iduna looks up. She can see her own eyes on her daughter's face, but she can see so much of her husband as well. The flatness in his expression, the grey in the blue where joy used to be. She can't stand it. She stands suddenly and rushes from the room. She doesn't move towards her and Agnarr's rooms. Instead, she makes for the library._

* * *

Erik's eyes are distant. Anna assumes the worst. _He's not back yet. He's still having a flash._ She rushes forward. Without the fog that accompanies flashes, she has no compunctions about approaching him. When she touches his arm, however, his reaction is immediate.

"Wha-?" His eyes refocus on her, as if he'd just been daydreaming. "Anna? Wh... Where is everyone? How did you clear the storm."

 _I swear his voice is different._ "U-um, They're near the castle. Probably in the ballroom. Don't you remember?"

He shakes his head, clearing it. "Right. That was just now, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, I -- wait, what? Were you having a flash?"

"No I just... Listen, I have to go."

"What? Erik, what are you talking about? You just said something about assassins before having the biggest burst of magic I've ever seen, and now we have to leave? Can you please explain what's going on?"

"I'm sorry, but no, I can't, not entirely. But," he puts a finger up as his sister opens her mouth to protest, "not because I'm unwilling. I barely know more than you. But Anna, I have to go. I know where to find a way to get your memory back."

"Explain what you know first! I'm not gonna just let you run off after this without filling me in!"

"Alright. Let's sit down, I'll do my best with what I know."


	10. An Update

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the author juggles this work as a personal catharsis, a struggle, and a thing other people will presumably one day read in full.

Well, it's about time I got on with things.

First things first: THIS STORY IS NOT DEAD. Just want to manage expectations before my prose gets too purple -- I have every intention of finishing this story, this update is, in the grand scheme of things, mostly just letting you all know how I'm gonna go about doing that.

To start off, let me apologize for the one or two returning readers this story has had -- I have a nasty habit of not finishing projects, and this is no exception. In this case, as with most of my fiction projects, it was because of mental health troubles and my lack of formal writing discipline. I don't have a great output at the best of times, but I'm getting better.

Next, let me apologize to anyone who keeps expecting me to update my Scooby Doo fic. That, too, I plan on updating, because people seem to really like it, but that's another story entirely.

So, what's going on, and how much of it do I owe it to you to tell? Well, I'll fill you in on the basics. This story has been eating my brain since I first saw Frozen 2 in theaters. It... changed me, and it helped me in ways I wasn't expecting. I have a storied history of lurking around the Frozen fandom, and while I don't engage with the community much any more, much of my teenage years were spent reading meta and fic on tumblr -- Frozen is a part of me that I can't, and wouldn't, deny. So to have the sequel impact me as much as it did felt like coming home. I had all of this _stuff_ inside me from years of fandom engagement before, this entire world that existed, projected on top of the first movie, and all of that came with me into the theater in 2019, and it fused with the film itself -- suddenly I saw this world, these characters, in their fullness, and I felt connected with them again, the same way I had years before, but more developed this time. I could see which parts of myself I was putting into the text, and where my headcanons and theories overrode the films themselves.

I'm being poetic, but what I'm trying to say is that when I saw Frozen 2, an image formed in my head. I saw the story of these films not as they appeared on screen, but as my heart would have them -- a perfected form, if you will. And I realized I could tell that story. I could take those dream movies that live inside my heart and put them to page, and other people could read them, and maybe see a glimpse of what makes them so special to me. I could show people what I love about these movies. So it wasn't long before I started typing away. I didn't have an outline per se, but I had an idea of where things needed to go, and I had confidence I could get them there.

As it turns out, that was my downfall. Whenever I sat down to write a new chapter, I basically got into my own head about the whole thing -- I let my anxiety about writing something people would like - something dramatic and exciting -- get in the way of my actual goal, which was writing a specific story that I need to tell for _my_ sake before anyone else's. And by the time chapter 9 came out, I felt trapped -- things weren't turning out the way I wanted at all, and my own memory problems were ensuring I kept making mistakes in things like character motivation and continuity. So I've been kind of avoiding it, knowing that if I wanted to finish it, or even get another chapter out, I'd need to start over, with a much clearer outline this time. But that itself was daunting, and -- well, you get it. The anxiety built itself up until I was paralyzed at the keyboard, basically.

So where does that leave us?

Even as I write this, I'm drafting an outline for the _entire_ fic, all three parts. I'm gonna post this, what you're reading now, and leave it up for two weeks. After that, I'm gonna change the name of this work (I like the title, and I want to use it for the main fic). I'm a little particular about archival, so I'm not gonna delete this version of the story, probably ever. Then you won't hear anything about this story for a while. I'm going to finish at least part 1 before I release any of it, and then drop the whole thing at once. This is for a lot of reasons regarding my own process and stuff. I promise the whole thing _is_ coming. I can't promise you'll like it -- in fact, I guarantee some parts will just feel like novelizations of the films -- but before anything else, this fic is for me. That you like it too is a mere hope. I want you to see what I see.

In the future, look out for "A Ringing in My Ear, or The Price of Knowing," a complete work.

Thanks for being patient with me. I've read your comments, and they always fill me with joy. <3

-Sabrina


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